I feel so pathetic and so disappointed at myself. I’m hurt and I know that it’s my fault. I feel like I’ve been doing so much but even after that, I’m letting myself settle for WHAT!! THIS!?? I can’t. I’ve been dealing with this for quite some time now. I tried so hard to understand and adjust to everything but it only makes me feel like a loser. And why does wanting something better only makes me feel worst cause it marks me as a selfish human being!? What’s even crazier is that after all this situations, I don’t even know what I want anymore and I’m losing myself. I feel like I’m starting to get immune as to how it is now but I don’t want that to happen. I could never allow that to happen. Don’t let that happen

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